Yak Exclusive: Big Brother’s Lydia Tavera Speaks Up Against Bullying

In accordance with our initiative this week, Big Brother 11’s Lydia Tavera took some time to send her thoughts, exclusively to the Yak, regarding bullying and the Anti-Bullying movement. Fans may remember Lydia with her unofficial partner of the game, Dae Yum Yum. Some may also remember her as part of the crew who grew extremely emotional when polarizing Jessie left the game that summer. Regardless of your impressions, stepping up for the cause is what this is all about. Here is Lydia’s story.

We would like to personally thank Lydia for stepping up and saying a few words about this important movement. In an effort to join forces and increase awareness, we encourage you to share these stories with your friends and family and encourage continuous efforts to make a difference! We all are capable and we just hope that this motivates and encourages each and every one of us to take a stand and put a stop to bullying once and for all. YakkityYaks, don’t talk smack!


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Okay, So… I’m Lydia Tavera from CBS, Big Brother 11. I am best known as the, “tattooed girl.” When someone sees my exterior appearance it’s obvious that I have a lot of tattoos. It’s safe to say I stick out in a crowd. My time spent on television was a whirl wind adventure to say the least. One of the darker sides of being on a national television show is harsh judgement by the world. The public feel they have to right to judge anyone they see on TV. I hate to burst the bubble but, “reality shows,” aren’t 100% real! Judging someone based on what is shown to you isn’t right. We have all done it, I know but what can be learned from people like myself is this, words have an impact. Words are heavy and things you say in person or on social media sites can impact a life. These words can hurt someones family and job. I have had my fair share of nasty comments said about me online. I have been called a wh*re, slut, tattooed trash, and been told that I shoulda killed myself. All those hurtful words have made me stronger. Every stone thrown at me is someone else projecting what they don’t like about themselves onto me. My tattoos are my armor, they make me different. Some people don’t understand others who are different and want to make things harder for them. Saying mean hurtful comments about someone for how they look, feel, act, or who they want to be is never right. I have learned to take the hurtful nasty comments and turned them into armor. Protecting myself, loving who I am and knowing that nobody is going to make me feel bad about who I am is the real power. With age I have learned this along with the fact that people who enjoy teasing others and sitting behind a computer trying to destroy someone’s character are the real cowards.

Never listen to somebody’s opinion of who you are and what your truth is. Don’t give someone else the power to make you feel bad. Hold your head up high and know in your heart that we are all different and that’s a wonderful thing. It’s so much easier to hate than to love, to judge and not accept. A phrase I often think about is “What’s popular isn’t always right and what’s right isn’t always popular.”

– Lydia Tavera, Big Brother 11

Anti-Bullying Week: “I felt as though nobody else cared either…”

All this week, YakkityYaks will be joining with past and present Reality TV stars and fans just like you in honor of Anti-Bullying Week. We will be featuring stories from Reality TV personalities, members in our YakkityYaks forum, and fans from Twitter and Facebook. In an effort to join forces and increase awareness, we encourage you to share these stories with your friends and family and encourage continuous efforts to make a difference! We all are capable and we just hope that this motivates and encourages each and every one of us to take a stand and put a stop to bullying once and for all. YakkityYaks, don’t talk smack!

Check out Big Brother 13’s Adam Speaking Out Against Bullying

Read on below for two personal accounts from fans on Twitter & Facebook who felt so moved to submit their own personal and touching stories, in addition to all of our other coverage today. Names have been changed to protect identities, but the stories are straight from the heart and unedited.

If you are interested in participating in our anti-bullying initiative by sharing your story, please contact JDMontgomery@yakkityyaks.com or ShellyBB13@me.com (Big Brother’s Shelly). Each and every story can bring about great change.

We also want to announce an exciting addition to our special features this week. Everyone who submits a story will be eligible to win a phone call from a reality TV personality!

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I will try to make a long story short as not to bore you with the uncomfortable details.

It really started in middle school. Sixth grade. Rude comments, dirty looks, snide remarks. I thought it was bad until I started high school. Then I prayed to go back to middle school. Middle school was hell and high school was worse. I remember on incident that is forever burned into my memory. I was walking down the hallway to class past “the popular group” and I swear all I could do was close my eyes and pray that day would be different. Nope. As I walked passed one guy stepped in front of me, so I stepped to the side and he did too. He knocked my books out of my hands and shoved me into a locker. Now, keep in mind this was my sophomore year and I’d been dealing with their crap for four and a half years already. I was pretty thick skinned by then. I picked up by books and went on my way without a tear or a word. They laughed, of course. I didn’t have friends, I had a few people I talked to in school, but nobody outside of school.

I didn’t care back then because everyone I had come in contact with was disrespectful to me, so I assumed everyone was like that. I didn’t care to have anyone to hang out with in fear they would only treat me the same way everyone else did.

I spent my time sitting a home, slowly distancing myself from my family and becoming a person I never imagined I would be. I slowly slipped into a depression that consumed every aspect of my life. My grades slipped, my teachers noticed something was different, but I, of course, said everything was fine when I was asked. My relationship with my parents was slipping away and I had minimal contact with them and my brothers. I got to the point where I didn’t care about anything. At that point in my life I knew exactly how a person feels just seconds before finally taking their life. I didn’t care if I lived or died, and I felt as though nobody else cared either. I remember sitting and making a list of who would care… I never finished it because I never wrote one name down. I felt that I pushed everyone away enough that they wouldn’t care if I was there or not.

It continue he’d even after I graduated. Adults aren’t always nice either. And then. It hit me one day. I was done. I was done letting everyone else run my life. I was done accepting those looks and comments from people who didn’t even know me. I was done accepting that I was less than worth it. I was done living my life in fear, fear of others and myself.

That’s the day I became a b*tch. That’s the day I stood up for myself. That’s the day I took my life back.

I’m now twenty five. Don’t get me wrong, there are still nights I cry myself to sleep because someone said something that hurt my feelings and it took me right back to high school, but I wake up in the morning knowing that I am worth it and I won’t be taking crap from anyone. I refuse to let others run my life with hatred.

People often joke about my “obsession” with my music. Music saved my life. And I don’t say that lightly. I say that honestly and I mean that with everything I have in me. Music became my escape from reality. I started listening, really listening to the songs and realizing, “Hey, the ‘person’ in the song got through that issue, so can I!” And still to this day, it’s my escape.

I know I said I was going to keep this short, but I failed. I hope it’s the kind of thing you were looking for and that my story helps someone else realize they they too can get through it.

I just want to be able to give someone else hope… hope for the future. I want someone to know that things can get better, but they have got to regain control of their life. I want at least one person to know that there really is someone that understands, that’s been there and that there are ways away from it.

One thing I encourage people to do now is tell someone. I pray that each child in that situation tells someone, anyone they trust (although when going through that, trust is a HUGE issue.) I encourage kids to find a teacher, parent, counselor, anyone they can tell. I didn’t tell anyone. Not one single person until a few months ago. Even after so many years, it was the hardest thing to do.

Love and hugs to you.

– J.S.

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Hi, my name is Alexis and I’ve been bullied. In elementary school, it was just minor things like having glasses and not having the “coolest” clothing and the way I walk. In fourth grade, two girls named Amanda and Nikki were the real tormentors. They got their friends on it and tried to get me in trouble by pushing me towards the teachers cars (never did get in trouble). Amanda would say stupid things like “I looked in her house and she was eating. (Guess I was a bit heavier than the other girls) In the African American community, hair is a very big thing. “Good hair” is long and silky. Mine wasn’t. Mine was short and short hair is considered “bald” to a lot of people, so I was often called bald.

Sixth grade came and I entered complete hell. Everyday was torture, from being called ugly and bald (for having short hair) to being called nerd. They would also often say I talked white because I talked proper. I’ve had books and food thrown at me. I’ve been scratched and kicked at. Had my shoes taken and thrown. It was awful. I let my grades suffer. Luckily, I wasn’t held back, but I did need a special transfer at the end of year for protection. (A lot of students ended up leaving because that particular school was horrible)

Seventh and eight grade was a bit better, but I was still being called ugly and bald. High school was okay, except for the boys who tried to make me feel like dirt by calling me ugly. I’m sad to say I often fought back instead of telling administrators, but I did not want my mom to worry to about me, as I’m her only child. She was so hurt about my time in sixth grade that I just didn’t want her (and administrators) to get involved.

I have often felt like if I were skinny with long hair, things at school would have been different. Things are okay now. The scars are still there, but I’m going to teach my kids that bullying is WRONG and to treat others they way they want to be treated.

– Alexis

Anti-Bullying Week: When Teachers Bully


I don’t think there is anything worse than when a teacher, a person that is supposed to be a role-model, a person who is supposed to be a safe place to run to for help, are the bullies themselves.

I, actually, had the unfortunate experience in dealing with one such teacher when my son was in 6th grade. You know, the time when kids are going through one of their most vulnerable stages, puberty. A time when they are learning about themselves, who they are and who they wish to become. My son was new in the school, a very small school, with only one class per grade. The children there already had built their relationships with others, so it was already hard for him to try and fit in. Well, along comes the teacher to show the other kids how they should treat him.

I couldn’t believe it. The stories he came home and told me… the things she would say to him… the things other parents overheard her saying to him as they walked by… and the coverup and accusations the school tried to throw back at my son. It was an extremely trying time as I’m sure you can imagine.

He had forgotten to bring in a paper once and she would lash out at him, telling him she doesn’t “want to see his face” and make him sit in the hall. It was constant. According to other parents, they told me she was notorious for it and always had one or two students in her class she would lash out at every year. What I didn’t understand was why no other parents were in an uproar over this? A child in 7th grade, his parent once told me, actually had to see a therapist because he was literally pulling his hair out with stress. She told me not to worry, that it “gets better in 7th grade.” Wait, what? That’s it? It just get’s better in 7th grade? So I should just tell me son to deal with it, it gets better in 7th grade? SHE’S A TEACHER!

It all came to a head at one point, with the school telling me my son was a liar, putting in the school bulletin a warning to parents not to “gossip” at drop off and pick-up. He even got suspended for 10 days because of my complaints. No wait, the school didn’t call it that. The school put him on “leave” until the teacher was ready to “look at him again.”

We got through it all eventually, the teacher was eventually let go, but not for a couple of years. The Principal also “retired” the same year. Why any child should have to go through that from someone that is supposed to protect them is beyond me. Unfortunately, it happens all the time. A recent story on MSNBC (Video below) shows a Special Needs student being bullied by her Teachers. Why become a teacher if you don’t care for kids? There are no words. Do NOT stand idly by if you see or know of this happening, like the parents at my son’s school who made us fight this battle alone. There is a child that needs your help. Next year, it could be your child and you fighting it alone.

Anti-Bully Week: My Personal Story

As you know, It’s anti-bully week and we here at YakkityYaks that have stories to tell are letting them rip! Along with Big Brother 13’s Shelly Moore, we here at The Yak are taking a headstrong stand against bullying and the life torment it creates. (Be sure to follow Shelly on Twitter HERE and follow us HERE.) It’s a hard, hard road on the other side of the bullying, and it’s time for those of us that have had this experience speak out and unite! We are NOT alone, and it does get better. Yes, the actions of others seem to stick with you forever, as you will learn with my own personal story below, but they don’t have to rule your life. You can overcome it, you can grow from it, and hey just maybe, we can make friends out of it. I think Shelly put it best when she compared the bullied to a piece of crumpled up paper. No matter how hard you try to straighten it out, even put a heavy book on it for years, the creases will never go away. It does “take a village” to protect our youth, and I for one am happy to be a part of that village. So, without further adieu, here is the story that I have, that since I was a kid, liked to always keep to myself… But today, for you, I will lay it all out there. Scary, but here we go.

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When I was a young, about 4th grade, I was transferred into a private school because of busing. The school district where I lived wanted to take me out of my local public school which was just right around the corner and transfer me to a school miles away. To combat that, my mother moved me to a local private school.

I was the new kid in a school where everyone had already grown up best friends. It was hard to adjust. I was also the kid that got into the private school because my dad did some construction work for them in exchange for part of my schooling there. The other kids, many of them, had parents that were loaded. Yep, the ‘ol rich kid/poor kid cliche. Well, I wouldn’t call us poor by any means, but by these kids standards, yeah, we were “without.” There were no uniforms at the school, so between me being the new kid and not wearing the designer outfits and shoes that most of the kids there had, I was pretty doomed socially from the start. I attended this school through the 8th grade.

I eventually made a few friends, not many, but the friends I did have were great ones. We met at what the majority of the students called “The Loser Table”… you know, where the “losers” sat to eat lunch. We were the misfits and at the very least, had others to share our woes with and boy, there were woes to be had.

All of us were taunted daily. Kids said the most ridiculous and mean things. I was chosen last for any games at P.E. even though I was pretty athletic and better at the games than most kids. In the changing room before P.E. they would make fun of me, my clothes, anything they could think of. I remember once being told that my bra was too high on my back… and they all would laugh. (So much for ever changing in the locker room again.) They used me to be mean to other people, singing that stupid K-I-S-S-I-N-G song if I would speak to a boy, only to have the boy get angry. (That felt great.) They called me a lesbian since I only hung out with my “loser” girlfriends. It was constant ridicule. I couldn’t even imagine how that would have felt if I actually were Gay and how kids today that are must feel.

When I would get invited back then to someone’s b-day party who wasn’t a part of the “loser table”, I would always believe it was sinister in some way. That maybe they wanted me to come just to be the entertainment. To poke fun at me. That never happened at the few I did go to, but now that I’m older, I realize I was invited probably because a parent made them invite everyone. Who knows. The ridicule made me paranoid of everyone’s motives.

High School changed EVERYTHING. I transferred to my local public High School where there were a lot more kids, kids that didn’t know me. I was a very, very pretty girl and had a lot of the boys attention. A LOT. The girls that tortured me daily were there, but at that point, they didn’t bother with me too much. Heck, I was getting more of the boys attention then they were at that point. I think they were actually a little jealous. That felt nice.

However, I wasn’t prepared for the attention I did get, and didn’t know what to do with it. For me, a girl with very low self-esteem at that point, attention was great. The problem became understanding that attention and what to do with it. Let’s just say, for a time, I had a hard time saying the word “no”, even when I wanted to. The one time I did actually say no, it didn’t matter, it wasn’t heard… or was heard and ignored, if you know what I mean. I won’t get into that here, but I’m guessing most will read between the lines on that one.

I did earn a nickname as a “tease” (which is better than some other nicknames that could have transpired, like slut or prude for instance.) I embraced the nickname. Damn right I was a tease! Now that I look back on it all, a tease keeps those boys on their toes now doesn’t it? You aren’t a prude, so they think they have a shot, but you aren’t a slut so they know they will have to put in some hard work to get it LOL! Looking back, I’m not real sure if that thought process was a good one or bad, but it did get me through it all.

The ridicule gave me self-doubt that followed me through-out my life, you know, the “creases in the paper” as mentioned above. Although I am much, much better today, a lot stronger, and a lot less caring of what others think, it still haunts me. There are days I still feel just not up to snuff. I don’t have many friends, mainly because I don’t let too many close. I like to call it self-preservation. However the friends I do have are great ones. I have encapsulated myself in my little world. There is safety within these walls, or is there? Yes, bullying affected me to my core and although the bullies are gone, I have carried their ridiculous words in my soul. It really sucks.

Needless to say, now that I am older and look back on all of it, it was a very hard time. I see pictures of myself back then and realize just how pretty I really was. (That sounds stuck up, doesn’t it?) Too bad I realized that a bit late. Self-esteem issues have plagued me all my life since then. It’s hard to let go of those, REALLY hard. You never really feel whole. There are times, even now, that I fall back into that hole and it doesn’t take much.

I learned a lot though. I try and treat others the way I would like to be treated. You know, what Grandma always said. I also overcame the “no” syndrome, able to not let people just walk all over me in the pursuit of acceptance. I have learned that what general “people” say really doesn’t matter. People that are strangers to me can think what they want. It’s their energy they are wasting. I have learned that It actually does get better. People who say that are right. It may not feel like it, but it truly does.

These people, these school mates, these assholes (for lack of a better (or worse) term) just don’t matter in the scheme of things. They are forced into your life now, but will be gone in a flash. I know, in this day and age, it’s hard. See, when I was a kid, home was my safe place, my sanctuary. Now, with Social Media, (Facebook, Twitter, etc.) the bullying can continue after school, on weekends, into the night… It’s hard to escape from. But again, those people will be gone in a FLASH. It seems like forever now, but it’s just a small snippet of your life. You CAN get through it. For all the rotten kids that talk smack, there are many, many more that you haven’t met yet that will be lost without you here. Plus, there are MILLIONS out there to talk to, have gone through it and can help. Hey, you always have a safe place to talk here at YakkityYaks. In fact, we are currently developing a place here just for that purpose, so stay tuned!

…And… let’s all hope Karma nails these jerky bullies to the wall. Yeah, I said it.

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If you too have a story you would like to share, you can contact us at JDMontgomery@yakkityyaks.com or webmaster@yakkityyaks.com. We would gladly get yours up here to share with everyone. We would also happily remove your name from the story if you would like. Just let us know in the e-mail. Also, you can come join us in the Forum HERE where we are all discussing Anti-Bully week!

Mel Gibson Returns, the New Comeback Kid?

Mel Gibson, Jaime Fox and Garry Shandling got together for a little brainstorming recently on how best to pay tribute to Robert Downey Jr. for his upcoming award at American Cinematique and below is how it went. Quite frankly, as much trouble Mel Gibson has found himself in lately, I loved this, and love a come back story. Heck, Robert Downey Jr. is a come back story all his own, so it all seems very appropriate. Hopefully, for me, Mr. Gibson has just found himself on the path up. Plus, you can’t go wrong with Jaime and Garry at your side! So, take a look below and tell us what you think!

Yak Exclusive: Big Brother’s Adam Poch Speaks Up Against Bullying

In accordance with our initiative this week, Big Brother 13’s Adam Poch took some time to send us his thoughts, exclusively to the Yak, regarding bullying and the Anti-Bullying movement. Adam really doesn’t need an introduction. Fans remember him as the heavy metal teddy bear who took control of our TVs and computer screens on Big Brother this past summer.

We would like to personally thank Adam for stepping up and saying a few words about this important movement. In an effort to join forces and increase awareness, we encourage you to share these stories with your friends and family and encourage continuous efforts to make a difference! We all are capable and we just hope that this motivates and encourages each and every one of us to take a stand and put a stop to bullying once and for all. YakkityYaks, don’t talk smack!

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Adam Poch, 39, Hoboken, NJI think the reason I got cast on Big Brother this past summer was because I am truly a unique individual. Not too many 40 year old heavy metal fans would admit to loving Beverly Hills 90210 and Appletinis. Being unique is not something that is new to me. Growing up I was always a little different and I grew up in a family where being yourself was encouraged. There were kids that used to tease me because of the way I dressed or acted – but luckily for me, I was confident in myself and would not let them get under my skin.

Sadly – there are a lot of kids that are not as confident in themselves and are easy targets for bullies. They are afraid to speak out against these bullies, for fear of what would happen to them. Even worse – they are afraid to be themselves and spread their wings and embrace their uniqueness. By allowing this to continue – we may be holding back the next great musician, the next great artist, or even the next Reality TV show winner.

By raising awareness – I know we will not be able to stop people from bullying others, but hopefully we can help those being bullied stand up to these bullies and show them they are just wasting their time and energy. Don’t let them bring you down to their level. Keep your head raised high – and be yourself. Parents should be talking to their children and let them know it is ok for them to be themselves & encourage your children to tell you if someone is bullying them.

Together we can make a difference!

– Big Brother 13’s Adam Poch

Anti-Bullying Week: “I never felt badly for doing those things …”

All this week, YakkityYaks will be joining with past and present Reality TV stars and fans just like you in honor of Anti-Bullying Week. We will be featuring stories from Reality TV personalities, members in our YakkityYaks forum, and fans from Twitter and Facebook. In an effort to join forces and increase awareness, we encourage you to share these stories with your friends and family and encourage continuous efforts to make a difference! We all are capable and we just hope that this motivates and encourages each and every one of us to take a stand and put a stop to bullying once and for all. YakkityYaks, don’t talk smack!

Read on below for two personal accounts from fans on Twitter who felt so moved to submit their own personal and touching stories, in addition to all of our other coverage today. Names have been changed to protect identities, but the stories are straight from the heart and unedited.

If you are interested in participating in our anti-bullying initiative by sharing your story, please contact JDMontgomery@yakkityyaks.com or ShellyBB13@me.com (Big Brother’s Shelly). Each and every story can bring about great change. Oh and get your tissues ready for this one …

We also want to announce an exciting addition to our special features this week. Everyone who submits a story will be eligible to win a phone call from a reality TV personality!

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A Life Transformed

First I just need to say that bullying back when I was a child is FAR different than the bullies today, but the hurt can still be the same. Also, I don’t know why I became a bully. It could have been a type of defense mechanism for what happened to me early in my life.

Here is my story:

Back in the early ’70s, when the Civil Rights Movement was going strong, my family and I were constantly bullied by our neighbors. Our house was vandalized. Walking home from school I got death threats and witnessed some man preparing a noose to hang my brother from. I was only 6 years old and feared for my and my family’s life.

We moved to a different neighborhood, but were still the minority in it. This time, however, I turned the tables. Although I was still in grade school, I didn’t call it a gang then; instead, it was a club. I think I was the president of it, although I can’t remember. I just know that I called most of the shots & threw people out of the group if I felt like it. Our club song was: “Tick-tock the game is locked. Nobody else can play with us. If they do, we’ll take their shoe and beat them ’til they’re black and blue.”

Still in grade school I would make fun of girls clothes and what they looked like; whatever it was that I didn’t like about them I would tell them about it. I even bullied my sister. Although to this day she forgave me, she didn’t forgive anyone else. I’d tell her she was adopted and that her breath stunk and that she was fat….again, anything that I didn’t like about her I told her about it.

Whenever my mom & dad fought, we were bullied by my mom. My mom hated my sister and me. She only liked our brothers. We got “skinnings” for the most trivial things. We got spoken to harshly, all because she didn’t always like us. Yes, parents bully their kids, too.

I never felt badly for doing those things to the other kids; after all, did those people who hated my skin color care what they did to me? Did they care how they made me feel? Did my own mom care? To this day, she doesn’t remember ANY of it. She tells people she was a good mom. “Look at how well my kids turned out.” I have tried to make her see and hear the things she did to us and she is in total denial.

I became a Born-Again Christian at 11 years old. There, I learned how to treat people. That’s when I became aware of the feelings of others and changed my ways. Anytime I saw a classmate getting picked on, I’d go over to them and keep them company. I’d tell a teacher, too, and the teacher would keep a lookout for any trouble. Like I said earlier, those days were different; mostly verbal and maybe knocking books out of someone’s hands, but nothing that the kids are going through nowadays.

A karate demonstration took place at the elementary school and then the instructor picked certain students to bully, to see how we would fight back. I got chosen to fight, and man, did I have the will and the drive to destroy that full-grown man! He had the nerve to push me to the floor? I was going to kill him! And I fought and found out how much anger I was storing up inside. He gave me a nice compliment, but I wasn’t to become a black belt until many years later.

Junior high was a brand new world. I got bullied by both boys and girls. They’d make fun of my hair and clothes. The same thing I did to the girls in grade school. The boys would grope me. In art class a boy took my artwork and threw it in the trash. I made the pom-pom squad and the girls told me I should have never made it; I only made it because I have a nice smile. I was called ugly.

One day one of the girl bullies was coming down the hallway towards me. My friend, George, came up behind me and scared me and I turned around and punched him square in the jaw! It wasn’t him I really wanted to punch; it was her. She saw me do it and her jaw hit the floor. I know she went and told the other bullies, because after that day, they never bothered me again. As for George, he never accepted my apology. Then he moved away.

High school was uneventful. Nothing serious there. Sports saved me.

In college I got bullied because I was black and hung out with my white friends in the quad. The black girls would yell stuff out of their dorm windows at me. I was called Uncle Tom and other racist names. I never had to do anything about those girls, because one by one, they got in trouble for something at the school and got expelled or dropped out.

By this time, I decided to take karate lessons. I’ve earned two black belts and one brown in all my years of training in different styles. I never made it a public thing to tell people, because they’d want to test me. It was on the down-low except for my immediate friends.

Once I made it to the working world, not much changed. Bullies, bullies everywhere. I became friends with a guy who was constantly bullied, then he had a crush on me; but I didn’t like him like that. I just didn’t like seeing him hurting from the actions of others. He did his best to stand up to them, too. Again, nothing physical happened, although nowadays people get killed.

Then I became the target from the same people who bullied him. Things were slammed onto my desk, they would talk about me so loudly that they wanted me to hear what they were saying, they were turning people against me who used to be my friends. No one came to my aid, but that’s okay, because if it really came down to having to physically protect myself, I could. I told my supervisor once, but they didn’t seem to take it all that seriously. A second time I told them, but this time I warned that if I snapped, it could get really bad. Soon after, the mastermind bully was let go. Once the serpant’s head was gone, the rest of the snake died; no one else bullied me.

I have seen strangers just arguing in a heated manner that could have escalated and I’d just approach, asking if everything is okay. Luckily, no one has ever gotten so angry at me and told me to mind my own business or turn their anger towards me.

I’m a part-time crossing guard and I look for signs from victims of bullies. I befriend the lonely kids. They can barely look at me, but I think they appreciate my kindness because the next time they see me, they smile. I don’t see them getting bullied walking to or from school, and I’m glad.

I have known a bully or two, and when I call them a bully, they deny it! I try to make them see and hear how they’re treating others, but it goes nowhere. They don’t get it. And I’m talking adult bullies!

I just can’t really stomach seeing people hurting people. All of these kids on Facebook and Twitter who are crying out for help, I want to help them, but I don’t find out their stories until after they’ve killed themselves.

I never want to get physical if I see someone getting bullied, and it’s been quite a long time since I stopped training, but I believe I would die for someone who is helpless; at least that’s what I tell myself. No one really knows what they would do until they’re in a situation.

Thanks for listening to my story. Really, thank you again, for everything.

D.P.

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A Little Says A Lot

My 11 yr old grandson was assaulted several times last year in a small WI school by another 5th grader. He had a sprained wrist, fractured elbow, mild concussion, and all the bully got was an in school suspension. It was not the 1st incident either. There was two choking incidents prior to that. It saddens me that children are so mean. I support everything you are doing. Thank you!

B.Z.

Anti-Bullying Week: A Yakster’s Personal Account

Throughout the week, in accordance with our Anti-Bullying initiatives, we will be featuring stories from our very own members in our YakkityYaks forum. These stories are volunteered from people who call our website their internet home and it is just another example of our personal feel and family attitude we pride ourselves in.

That, however, is not the focus of this week. Many, if not all, of these stories don’t need an introduction. They each have a very special message that will speak to us in different ways.

Just a reminder, the stories are unedited and real truths. We have only changed the names of those involved to protect their identities.

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My son, Brandon, who is 11, has always had it fairly easy in school. He’s always been an honor student and is friends with everyone. I wouldn’t consider him to be “popular,” because he has friends in all of the cliques and really doesn’t fit in to just one. He likes it that way, because he likes all different kinds of people.

When he was five years old, he was a very bright kid…he still is. It seemed that everything that he would learn in kindergarten were things that he already knew—thanks to his sister, Emily, who is just one year older than him. She would come home from school and tell him everything she learned and he instantly picked it up. So, we had him tested by the state to see if was a candidate to skip kindergarten and move on to first grade. He aced the test, so we decided to put him in first grade with his sister. We were concerned about how things would work out socially since he was a year younger than all of his classmates, but he fit right in and had absolutely no problems with any of the students.

Last year was the first time that Brandon saw first hand a division in his classmates. He and Emily were in sixth grade and they went to the middle school. Until that time, all of the kids, regardless of race were friends with each other. However, at middle school his Mexican friends wouldn’t talk to him (or any other non-Mexican kids) and developed their own clique. The year before, Brandon’s best friend was one of the kids who no longer talked to him. Since he was a year younger, he was much smaller than the other sixth graders (and would have been considered small even if he had been in the fifth grade). He was immediately targeted by his ex-friend and their clique. It started out relatively harmless. They would stand near him and talk in Spanish making it obvious that they were talking about him. As he has been taught, he ignored them thinking they would stop. When they didn’t get a reaction out of him, they moved on to shoving his books out of his hands in the hallway. After a week or so of not getting a reaction, it escalated to them punching him, usually in the arm or the back. Because he is so small, he knew that he was better off ignoring them. One day he came home with a red, puffy eye, so I asked him what happened. He kept telling me it was nothing, so I asked Emily. She convinced him to come clean with me about everything that had been going on. It was at the time that I found out about everything they had been doing to him along with spitting in his face. He had been dealing with that for nearly a month and never let me know what was going on. I was heartbroken to find out that my son had been going to school every day and facing these kids and was so afraid of what they would do to him that he never told me.

The next day I was at the school in the principal’s office to tell him what Brandon had been going through. He appeared to be just as upset as I was that he had no idea this had been happening. After I left, he called Brandon into the office to get his side of it and to get the names of the kids who had been bullying him. After watching the video, every student who had bullied Brandon in any way (from shoving his books out of his hand to spitting on him) was suspended for 10 days. Every student who stood by and encouraged the bullying was suspended for 5 days.

Thankfully when they all returned to school, the bullying completely stopped. Brandon is now in 7th grade and was on the football team with a few of the kids in that clique and they get along very well. They aren’t friends during school, but they work together as a team on the field.

I feel so sad and fortunate at the same time. Sad because he dealt with that every day for so long and fortunate because the end result could have been so much worse.

Thanks for reading my story.

-YY Member, Kristin

Anti-Bullying Week: “I had to invest all my trust in myself…”

All this week, YakkityYaks will be joining with past and present Reality TV stars and fans just like you in honor of Anti-Bullying Week. We will be featuring stories from Reality TV personalities, members in our YakkityYaks forum, and fans from Twitter and Facebook. In an effort to join forces and increase awareness, we encourage you to share these stories with your friends and family and encourage continuous efforts to make a difference! We all are capable and we just hope that this motivates and encourages each and every one of us to take a stand and put a stop to bullying once and for all. YakkityYaks, don’t talk smack!

Read on below for two personal accounts from fans on Twitter who felt so moved to submit their own personal and touching stories, in addition to all of our other coverage today. Names have been changed to protect identities, but the stories are straight from the heart and unedited.

If you are interested in participating in our anti-bullying initiative by sharing your story, please contact JDMontgomery@yakkityyaks.com or ShellyBB13@me.com (Big Brother’s Shelly). Each and every story can bring about great change.

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A Victim of Bullying

Hi there. Saw the tweet about calling for stories, so here goes mine.

It’s been nearly ten years, but I still remember the day vividly. For years, I had been teased on a daily basis at school. It started off because of my eagerness to learn and my good grades. ‘Egghead,’ ‘nerd,’ ‘teacher’s pet.’ Then it became my weight. ‘Humpty Dumpty,’ ‘big gut.’ Then once I started junior high, kids started picking up on the fact that I might be gay. Heck, they figured it out before I did. But the things they’d say, whether it be sly sarcastic jokes or outright name calling, took a daily toll on me.

At its worst, I would be heckled and teased for hours on end, especially during agriculture class, something I didn’t have an interest in but which was mandated by the school. The other guys in the class would take our textbooks and find every picture in the book that featured any aspect of male animal genitalia and ask what I would do with them. These questions would follow me down the halls, into other classes. I would complain and beg for action from any teacher who would listen. I turned to the school counselor and asked for help.

The day in question, I was in agriculture class again. The lewd questions continued. The heckling got louder and louder until finally I slammed down my books and high-tailed it right out of the classroom. I went out to find the school counselor. Coincidentally, she was coming out to see me. “We want to have a little meeting,” she said, and she led me into the superintendent’s office. The counselor shut the door behind her, joining me in a small office with her, the super, and the high school principal. This is good, I thought. They’re going to tell me what they plan to do to stop this.

Not so.

Over the course of nearly two hours, I was subjected to interrogation from all three of them, asking me to try and pinpoint what it was about me that made the other guys make fun of me. They highlighted my ‘effeminate tendencies,’ my lack of interest in sports, and explicitly told me that I brought all the teasing upon myself. They asked me if I loved myself. The superintendent looked me straight in the eyes after I told her yes, and said “I don’t believe you.”

They then began to tell me they thought I might try to “Columbine” my school, highlighting the then recent one-year anniversary of that school shooting, and advised me that they recommended I seek professional help.

My trust in adults was broken at that moment, at least those in charge of that school. I had no defense, no backup. There was literally no one I could turn to who could do anything, or would do anything, to help me. I was faced with a choice: do I prove everyone right? Do I hurt other people or myself because that’s what these people expected of me, or do I continue on the way I was, relying on nothing but my own future?

I chose the latter. I had to force myself to wake up every morning with the objective of getting through it, promising myself that I would eventually get away from that place and never look back. I focused harder on my grades, graduated, moved on to college, and today I have a very nice, well-paying job and a very loving boyfriend of two years. (Our anniversary was Monday the 7th).

I had to invest all my trust in myself. I knew who I was and trusted that would carry me through in life. And it has.

-C. E.

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A Bully’s Personal Account

Hey,

I guess you kind of know me. I hate telling my story. Because in my story I was the bully. Now, I’m only 16 but I know what I did was wrong. And I regret it 100%.

I live in Philadelphia, a place where almost no one is like the next. I’m not a kid with money but I had it so much better than most. There was a girl named Marie who rode my bus, and she had a lot less. I used to tell her some awful things. Call her names. And once it even got physical. She moved after 6th grade and she was easily forgotten. This year, she moved back and I noticed her at my school. She was always avoiding me. Then one day I approached her at lunch, and I told her how sorry and wrong I was. There’s not a day I don’t think about how much hurt and pain I put her through. I hate myself for that. Now Marie and I have join the school club S.U.R.E for peace. I’m on the strong, growing team of Anti-bullying activists.

Thank you for reading my story.

-S.D.

Anti-Bullying Week: YakkityYaks, Don’t Talk Smack!

Tomorrow, November 14th, is the start of Anti-Bullying Week 2011. The theme for this year’s initiative is “Stop and think. Words can hurt.” And that is exactly what we hope to get across throughout our many exciting events planned for this week.

In conjunction with some familiar Reality TV personalities, the Yak will be bringing you a number of special features throughout the week detailing countless accounts relating to bullying. We’ll be hearing from people who have been bullied in the past, are being bullied now, or even from bullies themselves. We’ll hear from parents of the bullied and those who work in the educational system. We’ll hear directly from fans of many reality TV personalities and we’ll hear from some of the most memorable reality TV stars, as well. The amount of support and stories that we have already received have been overwhelming and extremely touching. If this is any indication of what this week might bring, prepare to be changed and want to push for change!

Keep an eye out on YakkityYaks.com all week for all of these special reports and publications that we’ll be bringing you throughout the next 5 days. We would like to point out that this movement doesn’t stop after Friday. This is just a way to encourage people to get involved and stay involved.

Not only will we be providing stories and personal accounts for all kinds of people, we will be providing you with ways to counter bullying, suggestions on how to talk with your children regarding bullying, as well as ways to support some great causes out there looking to put a STOP to bullying as a whole.

So, stay tuned, tell your friends. This has already begun to change us and we hope it will do the same for you.

If you would like to participate in this initiative, please email us at JDMontgomery@YakkityYaks.com. We will change the names of those involved to protect identities and submissions can be kept anonymous if you prefer. We have a very special surprise planned for those who submit stories. Details to come … Let’s just say that your favorite reality TV personality might play a role.