Last week Survivor One World bored me so much I couldn’t even write a recap. It ended with the “see it coming for a mile” eviction of cocky Matt the attorney from San Francisco. Colton had placed himself in Queen diva bitch position in the Manono tribe.
Tonight’s episode opens with the Manono tribe returning from tribal council. Mike says that the “weak guys alliance”, consisting of Jonas, Troy, Tarzan, Colton and Leif were taking out the “muscle alliance” and that they didn’t know what they were doing. They were weakening the tribe so that they can’t win challenges. Tarzan talks to Troy and they agree that Bill is the next to go, they think Mike is clueless and not a threat.
Over at Salani on Day 9 the girls are cooking snails for breakfast. Monica says that snails, rice and coconuts can sustain them for 31 more days. Yum! The Manono tribe tries to make a deal with the girls. If they can use the fishing net they will give the girls half of the fish they catch. They figure this is a win-win! Chelsea speaks for Salani and says that she doesn’t see how feeding their competition is a good idea. The men are puzzled at Salani’s negative response.
There are 3 rewards to pick from: Blankets, pillows and a mattress; A Tarp; or Donuts, coffee, sugar, etc. It’s the old slingshot coconut challenge once again. This time the Survivors must break square panels in a wooden wall with the coconuts. You must break 5 panels in a row either horizontal, diagonal or vertical in order to win reward. I’d call this coconut Bingo. The competition starts out pretty evenly until the women make headway. The women ultimately win the challenge as the men stand dumbfounded. The women wisely choose the tarp. They now know the importance of staying dry. Wet pillows and blankets do you no good at all. The women win their third straight challenge and are offended when Tarzan who appears to be a poor sport, states that the girls won by sheer luck.
Back at Manono tribe Leif and Bill have a moment alone and Leif decides to tell Bill that he almost went home at last tribal council instead of Matt. Bill is shocked! Mike in a brilliant move tells Colton that Leif is talking to Bill. Colton says “that little munchkin is about to get knocked back to Oz.” Colton then summons Leif via Bill and demands to know if Leif told Bill he was next. Leif admits he told Bill that. Colton tells Leif, ” You just sealed your fate, you dug your own grave.” Leif tells the interviewers that he put a target on his own back and now he’s gone and done it.
At Salani tribe they receive tree mail regarding the immunity challenge. Kat and Alicia get into some type of confrontation over a comment Kat made about Alicia not being good at puzzles and not wanting to be her partner. Surprise! Alicia in yet another confrontation. I can’t tell you exactly what happened because i can barely look at Alicia let alone listen to her.
The Survivors are tied together in pairs. They must walk together over a seesaw to a puzzle. Once they have completed that puzzle they take the key from the puzzle and the next team moves on to another puzzle, another key, etc. There are 3 puzzles and 3 keys. Once all 3 keys are retrieved one person from the tribe must unlock 3 locks. Once those locks are unlocked they raise their tribal flag and win the immunity challenge.
The first team from Manono completes their puzzle and retrieves their first key. Simultaneously Alicia and Chelsea attempt to complete the first puzzle for Salani. They are stuck and can’t figure it out. They look at the completed mens’ puzzle and still can’t complete theirs. Tarzan once again screams “cheaters, cheaters!” as he is a freak. The second team of men complete the second puzzle and retrieve the second key. Alicia and Chelsea still struggle with puzzle number 1. The third team of men complete puzzle number 3 and retrieve their key. Finally Alicia and Chelsea finish puzzle number 1. By then the men have won the immunity challenge. What a blow-out. The men win by a mile. Jeff notices Alicia smiling and giggling and asks her how she can laugh after she’s done so poorly at the challenge. She acknowledges that she sucked. Christina jumps on this with the interviewers and hopes the tide is changing and that Alicia will be voted out instead of her tonight.
Sabrina tells Kim that Alicia is dead weight and needs to be voted off. Kim, once again, hesitates because Alicia is in their alliance. Personally I think Kim calls the shots on Salina tribe and she’s made two bad choices in my opinion so far, keeping Cat instead of Nina and now defending Alicia. Sabrina says Alicia has a bad attitude, doesn’t want to be there and has conflict with everyone.
Over at Manono Bill approaches Colton to talk. Bill is aware that Colton doesn’t like him and says he wants to discuss what’s between them. Colton says no he doesn’t want to talk to Bill. He says when I don’t like someone, I don’t want to look at them or talk to them. He tells Bill he has been the wishy-washiest tribe member and that he is going home next. Colton tells Bill he doesn’t want to be around him and dismisses him with “Bye.” This of course upsets Bill and their argument becomes heated although Colton might as well have put his fingers in his ears and screamed “I can’t hear you!.” The brain trust Colton then gets the idea that they should actually give the women immunity and the men should go to tribal tonight and vote out Bill! Tarzan gets wind of what is happening and starts one of his rants about betrayal and that they have to go to tribal tonight and vote out Leif for betraying the misfits. I don’t know about you but I’d much rather be stuck on the island of misfit toys with the snow monster as opposed to this island of misfits! The men all have to agree in order to give their immunity to the Salani tribe and go to tribal themselves. Why would Leif agree if he thinks he’s being voted out? Leif says that he wants to offer himself up in order to win integrity back with the guys. Leif if you’re home who cares??? Why would Bill agree? Bill thinks Leif is going home and that this is his golden ticket to stay in the game one more day. Jay is “bum-puzzled” about this. Frankly I think he just didn’t want to say the “F” word on national television. Colton is definitely running the show. Everyone else wants to do what Colton wants or they know they are next. Who will show up at tribal, the men or the women?
Jeff’s jaw drops and he shakes his head as the Manono tribe walk into Tribal council. What? In 24 seasons of Survivor this has never happened. Is this the dumbest or the riskiest Survivor move ever? He polls the tribe to insure that they have all agreed to be there. Jeff interviews the Survivors and asks Colton why he doesn’t like Bill. Colton says Bill is “anoxious” (not obnoxious) thought Colton’s hard job was that of a full-time student? Colton further says Bill is a loud struggling stand-up comic and should get a “real job”. Hmmm something like a full-time student maybe? Jeff tries to flesh out the differences between Bill and Colton. Apparently Bill came from a poor family and is living his dream trying to be a stand-up comic. Jeff pries to see if Colton is a racist and Colton says absolutely not he has African American people in his life, his family’s housekeeper, oh but she’s a member of the family. (Has he read THE HELP? I wonder if she has her own bathroom?) Colton lives in Alabama in a small town of 3,000 and went to a private all white school. Tarzan breaks in and says about the only thing I’ve agreed with. Tarzan says the “race-issue” irks him and that he is tired of it. He says he doesn’t care what race someone is, a person should be based on their integrity and their merit. He thinks racism is overused and we should be absorbing this change because we have a black president for crying out loud. He thinks Colton is being made out to be a racist which Tarzan doesn’t think he is. I don’t know about being a bigot but Colton has to be one of the most controversial figures ever to be on Survivor. His haughty, diva ways and his condescending self-righteous demeanor are extremely unattractive. I frankly wish he wouldn’t have admitted to being a Republican. He appears to have cruel intentions. Jeff wraps up tribal stating that it’s the craziest tribal in the history of Survivor. It’s time to vote. Colton continues to smirk, roll his eyes and check on his nails as Bill is voted out. Leif looks surprised and relieved.
Bill leaves with the classiest moment of all thus far in the game. He says regarding Colton, “He judged me because of my differences and I accepted him because of his.”
Bravo Bill, you’re better off without the island of the misfits.
Until next week, outwit, outplay, outlast!