Survivor Recap: Buh Bye Russell!

Russell arrives at Redemption Island to find that his tribe members lied to him once again when they told him that Francesca was at Redemption Island having ousted Matt in the previous weeks duel. He was surprised to see Matt who exclaimed “I was blind sided by Boston Rob and now I’m bunking with Russell!” Russell wasted no time bitching about his tribe to Matt disgusted that they had thrown a challenge just to vote him out.

Matt said that he was dueling for God (Seriously Matt? I, um, don’t think God cares about Survivor…) and Russell said he liked Matt and normally would be rooting for him but this was survivor and he planned on winning the duel.

The tribes received tree mail instucting each tribe to send two members to Redemption Island to witness the duel. Kristina and Phillip (secret agent) from Ometepe and Ralph (hairy beast) and Sarita from Lepatera.

Redemption Island Duel:

The challenge on Redemption Island consisted of setting up blocks on long planks including trip wires to form a domino effect, which would release a ball that would break a tile at the end. Neck and neck for most of the challenge, Matt pulled it out at the end and won the challenge, sending Russell packing. Jeff gave Russell the opportunity to spew, who then started crying. He said that he had too much respect for the game to go out like this and how pathetic it was for his tribe of pathetic bitches to vote him out when they didn’t come to play the game. Ralph took exception to that and decided to tell Russell he had the idol! Russell looked over at the Ometepe tribe members and said see, he’s so smart he’s giving you his game plan and all the information you need! Ralph then realized what an idiot he was being and instead of pulling the idol out of his bag said he was kidding. Phillip said “No you’re not! I’ve spent my career reading people and working in covert operations and I know he’s lying!”

Russell proceeded to tell the Ometepe members the specs on the Lapatera tribe, who was in what alliance and who ran the show, etc.

Matt returned to redemption island to await yet another challenge. Russell said he will not return to survivor that this was his last season. (To one of our forum members: There ya go Grandma!) Bye Bye Russell, it’s been fun.

Phillip and Kristina return to Ometepe where Philip (special agent!) tries to make a deal with Rob and Grant (Hottie alliance) that he will tell them all the details if they will consider keeping Kristina longer. Rob is shocked that Phillip is so clueless (Really Rob, you were shocked?) that he didn’t realize that Phillip was supposed to be in an alliance with Grant and Rob, and why was he trying to save Kristina? Rob said “You work for me don’t you?” in his interview.

Who in the world knows what Phillip is thinking. He is certifiable in his disgusting “baggy pinkies” (that would be baggy pink tighty whities). I digress…

Immunity challenge:

Take the tools from the toolset and saw/ hammer/ hatchet/ dig/ build a plank/ etc. to the finish line. It was close but Lapatera won again and also won a reward of a BBQ from Sears (insert commercial) and all the BBQ fixins. (Seriously is this survivor or Club Med?)

Phillip does his “team meeting” as usual after losing the challenge and the girls frankly want to throw him in the fire. They cannot stand him, they think he is annoying, weird and just plain creepy. I seriously don’t know who is more repulsive creepy, Federal agent Phillip (eeeewwwwww) or hairy beast (suck dirt out of your nasty fingernails) crow like a cock, heinous Ralph. It’s a toss up but one things for sure; The casting of this show was decidedly short on eye candy both for women and for men. The producers decided to go with weirdness this season. (This is why we are saved by the Hottie alliance of Rob and Grant the ex-NFL member, praise the Lord.)

The entire Ometepe tribe wants to vote out Phillip because he is such a loose cannon and a huge annoyance. No one on the tribe can stand him. Rob, however, thinks Kristina is too big a risk to leave in the game because she’s smart and savvy. Rob had found the immunity idol earlier in tonights episode but pretends Kristina might have it so they decide to split the vote and vote out Kristina.

Tribal Council:

More dialogue from Phillip on his status as special agent (shoot me now please!) and he and Kristina battle back and forth. Rob’s alliance stays true to his wishes and Kristina is sent off to Redemption Island to battle Matt who has already beaten two competitors. GO MATT!

I really don’t know how much longer I can keep watching unless they pin Ralph down and shave his body hair, and put some clothes on Phillip! If you look up EEEEWWWW in the dictionary, I’m sure their pictures are in there!

Until next week… This is your resident Survivor Fan OUT!

What do you think? Who are you rooting for this season? Were you happy to see Russell finally go, and Kristina sent on over to the Island? Let us know below, and don’t forget to check out the Forum HERE for all things Survivor!